Larry’s Lesson

I thank God for my gifts and for testing me so I can continue on the right path. I ask my Angels to guide me as I write and I thank them for helping me stay strong. I hold the intent all of you will realize what’s important in life before it’s too late.

What a crazy 2 weeks it has been for me. So many blessings, scares and surprises. Everything is good now and I’m thankful for the crazy ride because it helped me focus on what’s most important in my life. Last Wednesday I went to the park in the morning before I had my tests done and when I sat on my regular bench for my meditation I noticed the person’s name who the bench was in memory of. His name is Larry ? Esq. My initial thought was I wonder what kind of person he was when he was living. Then suddenly I thought I wonder if he focused on materials and power rather than family and fun. Once again something told me to check my daily inspiration email and this time it said the “top 10 things the deceased wish they would have known before they moved on”. That was a little strange and on the list was ” realizing happiness, family/friends and love were what was the most important.” Then I really felt Larry was there with me because I sensed an arm wrapped around the back of my neck and it gave me a warm feeling. So now I guess I have a buddy to sit with every Wed too. Anyway, I gave it some more thought and I think this blog will be about what Larry’s message would be if he had the chance to change things for himself now that he knows what life is truly about. He may want his lesson to be known so others will learn before it’s too late.

So this one is about Staying focused on what’s important. God is really stirring up my life lately and it started with a huge financial blessing. Then a few days later I decided to finally get myself checked out by the Dr because of some pain I’ve been having. This started my mind to think no amount of money is worth my health. Then God sent some surprising news our way from a family member who is going to need some financial support too. So then I thought God blessed us with money to test us with how we would react to the money. Please keep in mind I’m always using myself as an example and I’m never bragging about anything in my life. Anyway, initially when Ron and I were blessed with this money we were high fiving each other and deciding what we would do with it and we were excited about reaching financial comfort. On a side note here- last year we had some really hard times financially and then we turned to faith. God sent us someone who wiped out our financial struggles and has continued to bless us. My point is if you are struggling financially then please pray for financial comfort. It will come once you believe and are grateful for the money. Money comes from ways you can’t even imagine and at random times too so just relax and have some faith. And I asked the universe to send me the money I need so I can continue with my healing sessions and that’s why it appeared since I’m meant to have these sessions too. I see 555-change is coming. So the money came first then I was waiting on my health issue and this is when it hit me that health comes first before any dollar bill. So I spent a few days focusing on my health and just let the material wish list move to the back. Then a few days later we got a call with some news and we knew we are meant to help out. So now our plan for the money has gone from remodeling the house and bedroom furniture to doing what’s right and helping the family. My health has been cleared and no more tests are needed. I know my chakras are all out of whack and are going through some healing but my Dr would never understand that so I let her send me for tests just to make sure it’s not something severe. I see 222. As much as I desire my bedroom to be remodeled I know it’s not right when someone else needs help. So it was another life lesson and I believe once again Ron and I passed. We know what’s right and we are happy to help anyone who needs it. We get excited about our wish list but once we think about it we realize we are practical people and we really don’t need most of the things we thought we wanted anyway. Sometimes it’s fun to get a little lost in the dream world. However, when people don’t break away from the pull that money sends off they start to focus only on the money and lose the rest of their life. Maybe this is what Larry did and now he has regrets. We all know money can be evil but sometimes other things cause us to lose ourselves and let our family and friends go. Not saying all relationships are meant to stay in your life but the ones that surround you with love should stay. We all at some point in our lives have been hurt and we also have hurt others too. Unfortunately, this creates a lot of friction and some relationships end with negativity attached and grudges are formed. So this leaves you with a choice- forgive and forget or stew and suffer. So many of us have a very hard time with communication and this creates major problems. Sometimes all it takes is a simple conversation to realize what we are annoyed about was really our own creation and not the actual case. I see 999- get to work on your purpose. However, some people can be stubborn and you can never force someone to make amends with you so if you tried and it did not work then move on knowing that’s how it’s meant to be. But you must try so you don’t have regrets. This way you can go on living with peace since you made the attempt to forgive and forget. Fate decides if it’s meant to be or not. For me, I have reached out to some people to clear the friction and it did not work. I also know in my heart I’m not meant to have these people in my life anymore too. You will know because it’s when you don’t have the constant thought of “maybe I should try to make things better.” It’s almost like you lose the desire to be around them anymore. That’s because as your energy changes you pull away from those who are not vibrating on your level and you lose desire to be around them since your energies are not attracted to each other anymore. It’s a sign you have grown so it’s a positive change too. So maybe what Larry is saying is he let people go who should have stayed. Maybe he was the one who refused to make amends by being stubborn. Maybe now he sees he was the one in the wrong and he should not have held so many grudges because he sees how much pain he caused himself by creating his own beliefs about the situation. So many maybe’s but now it’s too late to change it and it makes you wonder how many people are left hurting because of the conflicts that were never resolved. So ask yourself if there are people who you should make amends with in your life. If the answer is yes then I suggest you listen to your heart and make the attempt to forgive and forget. I really don’t think any of us purposely try to hurt people it just happens because mentally we can’t deal with our own issues and then we take it out on our loved ones. That’s why communication is key because if our loved ones don’t know what is going on with us then they are left to assume which leads to creating their own beliefs of the situation. Then everyone is suffering over things that are not even an issue. My goal in life is to heal myself, learn to live through love rather than fear and to leave this world without any regrets. For me to achieve all of that I will need to face my own issues and turn them into loving ways which means for everything and everyone that hurts me I will need to find a way to forgive, forget and learn to love. Not so easy but it’s not impossible. There are plenty of people who have crossed my path that I could find so many things about them that I don’t like or how they have treated me but I do try to choose to view it as a chance to make myself better by finding something good in them or simply saying “it’s their life” so I don’t judge them anymore. I see 555- change is coming- felt like someone is thinking of a particular person right now and hoping things will change for the better- take this as a sign positive change is coming. And now you are wondering if that was meant for you and yes it was. Crazy how I will know things days before it happens lol. Btw I have no idea who but I know someone so don’t get freaked out lol. I feel it’s better to let go than to let it cause yourself harm. I’ve changed my ways by asking myself “do I want to be a bitter person with a lot of anger inside?” My answer is always NO and I learn that’s not who I am anyway so it helps me look at things with love rather than fear or negativity. I know it’s hard to forgive people sometimes but if you listen to your heart you will find you don’t want to be a bitter and angry person either. Anger is the most destructive to your soul. You may think you can hide it but it always shows in your behavior in life. It lowers your energy and it will make people pull away from you too. So make peace with those you love and make peace with yourself too. There is still time but don’t wait too long and leave with regrets. Larry knows what is on the otherside now and he wants to save people from leaving with regrets. Hopefully you will learn from Larry’s lesson.

Cards

Three jumped out as I was shuffling so I will use all 3

“You Know what To Do”- Trust your inner knowledge, and act upon it without delay.” like it says trust yourself because you already know the answer- it’s what just came to your mind.

Patience- “your dreams are blooming more rapidly than you realize. Still they need nurturing and patience. Patience is soooo challenging but can’t force things that are not meant to be yet so do yourself a favor and stop and take everything as it comes and one day it will all come together for you. I do this and it works because I was once someone who had no patience.

Leadership- this was last week too?- “it’s time for you to assume your leadership power and position, and lovingly guide others.”- when it’s a repeat that means someone is not listening. If you have found your purpose or think you have figured it out then it’s a sign to get to work.

Always Believe…

Worth the Wait

I thank God for my gifts and for everything that has been given to me in this life. I ask my Angels to guide me as I write and I thank them for the much needed support. I hold the intent all of you will take a rest so you can figure out which way to go with every situation life sends you.

It’s one of those try and keep up weeks for me again. So much is going on between Ron’s schedule, Aydin’s parties, sports, school work there has not been anytime for my “mental health day”. It rained last Wednesday so I skipped the park but I’m really starting to feel my soul telling me I need to get back on track. I see 111- keep thoughts positive. My healer should be back in town next week so I’m hoping I can have another session so I will get motivated once again with healing my physical self too. There was also a solar eclipse this week too. It’s linked with Taurus so if you are a Taurus like me this is meant to be a huge time for new beginnings. I only follow astrology a little bit so I don’t know too much but I did learn that’s why I keep having a strong feeling change is coming my way. Anyway, it was an energy shift and those of us who are sensitive will feel it strongly and those of us who are aware of how it affects people will be able to witness how people act strange during these shifts too. So many of you have no idea what is going on and just think you are having a bad day. Sometimes I don’t realize it either and then I read something that tells me there is a shift and I understand why I felt so off that day. The universe is so much bigger and more powerful than we could ever figure out with our human minds. These shifts happen often and its forcing people to change but some people fight it and it comes out as anger. I see 333- they agree. If you tend to have moments of intense anger but can’t understand why then most likely it’s the energy shift working on you. Just breathe and you will feel better in a day or two. So it’s been one of those weeks and now that is it ending I decided to rest a little so I can sort a few things out that are running through my mind.

So this one is about Sorting it all out. In my dream world there would be a spot for everything. Meaning in my house there would be no clutter building up, in my mind there would be a perfect schedule for when my healing would take place and my daily life could run on a routine so I could keep up. That’s one dream I know I need to be realistic about and accept it will never happen. It’s not suppose to happen that way so it won’t. Life is unpredictable for a reason. You may have gut feelings or been told a little about your future but you never know for sure until it happens. It’s during the waiting period that you are meant to learn the lessons that come with this life. I’m in a waiting period right now and this next week will tell which way life is going for me. I have a gut feeling but I also have the voice saying “you could be wrong”. In this case if I’m wrong it’s a good thing but if I’m right then I know what my big change will be. So I have a lot of thoughts running through my mind and naturally I’m looking into the future and thinking “What if”. I keep thinking about my numerology reading this week and Alison told me my chart is very rare because I have “0″ challenge in this life. There are 9 different challenges in life according to numerology and you have 4 parts of your life when these challenges come in. Some have the same challenge and some change at different ages. However, with a “0″ challenge it could mean my life is so blessed because I have completed my challenges in another life and I came back for charity purposes or it can mean my soul chose to take on a little bit from each of the 9 challenges so I could evolve more. I think I chose the 9 challenges in this life. This has been some life and I’m only 37. So as I’m facing this coming week I keep wondering if I chose this possible challenge and now it’s time for it to start. I just saw 777- on the right path. Or maybe this one week is meant for me to take some time to think things out a little and it’s a test for me. So I have been spending some time thinking if “A” happens then it’s over and I can go on with peace of mind. If “B” happens it’s going to be a challenge but I believe I can get through it.
So now it’s been a couple of days since I wrote the above. I keep having visions of when people tell me “enjoy these days because they go by fast” when they are talking about my children. I always answer ” I try but some days it’s really hard to do that.” Maybe it’s me or maybe it’s the type of children I have been given but there are days parenting is very difficult. Just today Ron and I had a discussion about Aydin. Aydin is very high energy and as he gets older he is getting harder to parent. When they are toddlers and have high energy it’s more about trying to keep up but when they get older and have a voice that speaks they really test your patience. I’ve asked his teacher about his behavior in school and she told me he listens and is very well behaved. She even said “that’s wonderful that he is able to control is energy in school.” Wonderful for her but Aydin can really make Ron and I crazy. I know when Ron gets frustrated it’s not just me because Ron is the calmer one out of the two of us. So we had a talk and came up with a plan about how we are going to try to improve things on our own with Aydin. If this plan fails then I told Ron we need to find a parenting class before this gets any worse. If you have been blessed with the perfect little calm angels then you are lucky but if you have the kids that are impossible to manage sometimes then I feel your pain. People don’t understand until they deal with it on their own so don’t let people make you feel like you are doing it all wrong. Parenting is different with each child so it’s a matter of figuring out what works for you and your children. Today is Mother’s Day and I actually cried today as I was talking with Ron and Aydin about his behavior because it breaks my heart that my son is changing so much for the negative. There has been a huge change in him from 5-6(he will be 6 in a few weeks). He has a lot of sweetness to him but there are times he says things that make me wonder what kind of person he will be as he gets older. He makes comments about things that people did 2 yrs ago that he did not like and he holds a grudge, if something little happens he often says “that’s because they don’t like me.” To me these are signs he has self esteem issues and he can’t let things go. He is also very spoiled and it’s starting to show in a negative way. So Ron and I have some work to do and hopefully all of us will be able to figure it out. I see 444-nothing to fear- Thank God. I’m not the perfect parent but I’m not a parent who will live in denial and ignore my child’s issues. So as I face this week a lot of my concern has been if I’m faced with a major change how will it affect my children’s lives. I’m trying not to think “what if” but it’s hard not to since my kids would be my main concern. My kids come first with everything so if I was hit with this change then I don’t think that would be possible so I can’t help to think about what would be the next plan. So I decided my plan would be I do what I can do. Meaning if it can be done then it will and if it can’t I will reach out for help. Same goes for Aydin’s behavior issues. He is not what some may label “troubled or problem child” but he is showing signs that there may be some issues within himself. I asked him about how he feels when he is acting out and so far he has said he feels like it’s his energy is hard to control. So we will start by eliminating sugar from his diet to see if that helps since that could be why his mood is changing too. Is that the cure? Who knows but it will be step one. Just like my own situation right now. This week is step one and if I need to continue on to step 2 then I will plan as I go with what is going on at the time. So really this can relate to any troubling situation in life. You can only handle things the best way you know how. If your were supposed to know exactly what to do then you would have been given a manual with life. It’s trial and error each time. And each time a lesson is learned and strength is gained to move forward with life. A lot of us strive to be perfect but really none of us are. We make life hard for ourselves by trying to “know it all” and do it right. If only we could find a way to relax and take things one step at a time life would go a lot smoother. That’s why living in the moment is the best way to live but it’s also the hardest way to live. Life is so unpredictable so when you get yourself centered on living in the moment about one thing then another issue comes your way and throws you off. So now you have to start all over but each time you start over is a chance to learn too. There is a divine plan with everything in life so if you get yourself to trust in the plan then you will relax. The plan is always about our lesson that needs to be learned and not about making life hell. There are always hidden blessings present. My own problems this week will teach me a lot about life. The problem I’m facing with Aydin will teach me to be more patient and I will learn how I need to change so things can get better for all of us too. My personal problem this week will also teach me to prioritize my life because things can change at any minute. I see 888- abundance coming. I’ve grown to expect change and this has helped me to fight for survival too. I always get through the changes smoother than I thought I would as well. So if you are facing some tough times right now and you are waiting for them to be over then change your perspective to “what’s this meant to teach me.” There is a huge lesson but depending on how you look at things will determine if you pass the test and get what you need from the sitiuation. If you don’t fix your mind then you won’t fix your life. I repeat that all the time because the mind is what creates your hell not the actual experience. I see 444- nothing to fear. So play the game of life and when life throws those hard balls at you then ask yourself “will I wait this out and learn” or “will I get knocked down and quit.” No quitting please, no matter what it is there is always a way to survive. Catch the hard balls, wait it out and when the right time comes life will show you why it was worth the wait.

I see 111- keep thoughts positive.

Cards

Leadership- “It is time for you to assume your leadership power and position and loving guide others.”- I would say this means set the example for others. It reminds me of working for my Dad and whenever he would be tough on me he would tell me because “you need to set the example”. So life might be tough on you so you learn to survive and can set the example for others with similar problems. We teach each other and we learn from each other too.

Angels Therapy- “give any cares and worries to us Angels, and allow us to take your burdens.” This really works when you ask for support. Today is 5/15 and I had some tests done and as I was getting the test done I noticed an Angel hanging on the wall and I just prayed for support and some good news. It worked because I was clear from step one and now just need to wait for the Dr to tell me if I need to search another part of my body but I was relieved the pink ribbon was not meant for me today.

Always Believe…

It’s a Breeze

I thank God for my gifts and for helping me learn so many lessons. I ask my Angels to guide me as I write and I thank them for helping me see the positive in life. I hold the intent all of you will learn life is good.

I love when I see “Life is Good”. It reminds me so much of my Uncle and I always feel he is telling me he is around at that moment and reminding me to keep going. I could go on and on about why I feel life is good but this blog will be more about how I learned to decide that life is good.

So this one is about the view of life. I’ve been detoxing from fb for a couple of weeks now and gradually I have been checking it more and more when I’m bored. I never realized how much negative energy I absorb from it until now. OMG reading about people’s problems, world issues and nonsense is so draining. My mood went from feeling good and I clicked on fb just because I was on the computer to I’m so annoyed and confused about life all because of a few things I read. I just read something on fb about the chemtrails destroying the organic crops and something about J+J baby products being harmful. So now I’m thinking why even bother spending so much money on organic and have I been poisoning my children for the last 6 years. It’s so frustrating to live in this world not knowing who tells the truth and what really is the best thing do to be healthy. This is what happens when I search outside of myself for answers. I get really frustrated and untrusting. Life is so good when you are able to get yourself to the point of shutting everything out that surrounds you. Meaning when all of your focus is on what your heart is saying to you and you are truly following it too. For the last week I keep having a vision of when my hooker ex wanted me to start dating him. I remember saying to him “I’m so messed up so why would you want to date me and do you have any idea what people will say if we did date.” He replied ” I don’t give a f**k what people think I care about what you think.” He was saying it in a badass way but I remember thinking “what does that feel like to not care what people think.” I really wish I could have thought that way back then because I would have spared myself a lot of internal pain but over time I did learn some really good lessons too. Then today I was driving to my Dad’s store and my Uncle came to my mind and he always liked Stevie Nicks and something told me to listen to her so I did. During one of the songs she sang a part that said “I tried to dance with what life had to hand me” and “if I could I’d do it all over again.” It made me think about the times in life when maybe we would not have done things a certain way and would change them if we could go back. So I thought “would I change anything about my life?” I heard my heart say “NO”. So I thought about it a little more and learned I really would not change anything. I’m grateful for my tough times and I’m happy with who I have been molded into. I view life as good because I have learned from viewing life as bad. I have felt the lowest of the lows and have felt the highest of the highs and have decided I care about what I think first before I listen to what others think. I also care about others opinions but my own opinion is what will mold be into who I am as a person. I see 222- keep the faith. I have experienced so many different levels of depression and happiness. I can also see through people and can tell by their behavior what is going on with them internally. When I read the ones who behave in a negative way my first thought is always “I’m so happy I don’t live life like that anymore” but then I look deeper into myself and will remember some times when I was just as negative on the inside too. So then I feel sorry for those people who are stuck in that way of life. However, when I read the happy ones it motivates me to keep living a happy life. I learn to take a few minutes and really appreciate everything about my life good and bad and past, present and future. The good and bad of the past and present creates the future. How much you grow from each experience in your life creates your future. If you grow as you go then a positive future will come. If you get stuck in a negative place then tomorrow you will still be there and everyday after that too. I see 444- nothing to fear. It has so much to do with how you view your life. My life is no different from anyone else but since I learned to find a positive with everything or stop myself from stressing over the petty things life is good. I’ve been trapped in the negative state of mind before so I know how it’s easy to let the days go by and never make any effort to change yourself. It may seem easier to just accept life as it is but you will never learn how good life can be if you don’t give it a chance. Don’t expect to wake up one day and suddenly life is wonderful. What you send out is what you will get back. So depending on how much you try to change will determine what life will send your way. So maybe you are thinking that you already send out good but you still get bad back? Why? Ask yourself “do you feel you truly deserve the good in return?” or have you not forgiven yourself for past behavior and deep down feel you asked for the bad so that’s why you are getting it. I explained before that we control what comes our way by allowing it into our lives. If you don’t feel you deserve it than it will not come. Not because the universe does not have the power to deliver. It’s because you are not open to receive it and then it gets pushed away. Trust me I have issues with receiving and have seen this happen in my life multiple times so I know this is how it works.

Today is Sun 5/5 and last night I had a crazy dream that people were trying to drug me and they wanted to stop me from living out my purpose in life. It was one of those dreams that jump around but I was fully aware of my emotions and can clearly remember the entire dream so I know it was a message. Whenever I have vivid dreams I usually look up the meaning of anything I remember about the dream. I don’t rely totally on a dream dictionary to tell me the message but I check just so I can get an idea about what the Angels are trying to tell me. Most of the time I will connect with the meaning right away or a little later after some more dreams happen. So the “drugs” symbolized me turning away from my problems about some part of my life and I’m not taking responsibility. At one point in my dream I watched myself say “I just want someone to tell me this is all real and I’m not crazy”. I swear whenever my hooker ex comes to my mind I draw in negative energy too. However, this dream did open up my eyes a little too. Every time I write a blog it’s my soul’s way of guiding me and telling me who I truly am and what’s in my heart. Then I go back to my soul self with the ego attached. So I’m tested and when I read the blog I learn who I really am and then I can heal myself by looking at things the way the blog told me to do. I can’t really explain it fully but it works for me. So I know I have been falling off of the path this week. I was slacking with my healthy diet, my healer has been away for 2 weeks so I’ve been slacking on connecting with my guides each day and I’m focusing more and more on my earthly life and letting my spiritual side slip a bit. I’m not supposed to do that so there is the lack of responsibility. I could tell this was happening because my physical pain and emotional ups and downs were returning and that’s a sign I’m not balanced. Then I have a dream where I see myself questioning my sanity and it was a wake up call because there is no way I’m going down that road again after all the work I have done to accept my gifts and knowledge. I see 555- change is coming. I know something big is brewing too- just don’t know what yet. Well a helicopter is flying over my house now so I guess that means no worries .
So now it is Sun night and a few times today I was not feeling myself and had some doubts and anxiety. I decided to do some reading tonight and something told me to read my mediumship training book. I opened the book up to a random page figuring this would be what I was meant to read and it was about psychic attack from the living. I know when my emotions are not my own and this happens to me quite often but I can’t ever figure it out until the negative thoughts and feelings go away. It’s so important to protect yourselves from the energy of others. Just ask to block it and send love in that direction too. BTW, when I say send “love” it means be kind and caring and willing to help someone who struggles by wishing them well with good thoughts for them. Anyway, once I read about psychic attack I knew I needed to clear my aura. I also continued reading about automatic writing and inspirational writing. It described what goes on with a medium when this happens and I felt better once I read it because I experience everything the author wrote. So that was my Angels way of telling me “I’m not crazy” just like I wanted to know in my dream. I also took a few minutes and said some prayers to God and asked him to help me stay strong. I told him that I don’t ever want to go back to viewing life in a negative way so I ask him to protect me from negative energies. Right after that I had the urge to write and when I logged on I noticed a blog and read it which was about living your true colors. So it was a pick me up and a reminder I can and need to continue on this path. So once again I have decided to view life as good. Life goes up and down everyday. My blogs change every week because I write about what is going on during that week. Sometimes they are inspiring , sometimes I’m struggling and sometimes I’m teaching but it shows my life is not the same every day. When I’m struggling I learn ways to keep faith so I can be positive again. I see 999- get to work on your life purpose. My purpose is to show my struggle and teach how I survive too. My dream happened last night as a warning there would be something working on me to try to get me to give up on living out my purpose and luckily I was able to send it away. Had I chose to view my life as bad I would have allowed the negativity to take over and that’s when I would have been stuck in the sad, depressing life. If you view life as bad right now then please try your best to change it. Again I can’t force people but I can say I have been there before and if you just say a prayer and ask for help then you will be sent signs and peace. Each day you will learn to trust those signs more and eventually you will look at life in a more positive way. I personally would have been in a very dark place right now if I did not turn to God and the Angels. That’s why I never turn away from them since they have truly saved my life. Really that is the best advice I can give since we are not the ones with the power. We are here to learn and they are sent here to help us stay on the right path. I see 222. When you are on the right path then life is good. However, if your view is bad then it’s time to ask for help so you can find your path. It’s a messed up world and life is crazy but when you take the bad with the good life is a breeze. Gotta love Stevie she is a tough chick!

Cards

Courage- “Be courageous, and stand up for your beliefs.”- Always do what you feel is right no matter what anyone else thinks or says. This is your life so live the way that makes you feel good. That’s how you know it’s the right path for you too.

Victory- “Your prayers have been heard and answered. Have faith.”- This one is always a good one- prayers are always answered but sometimes by the way we are not expecting so take a closer look and you will find the blessings.

Always Believe…

Happy Trails

I thank God for my gifts and for always blessing my life. I ask my Angels to guide me as I write and I thank them for their never-ending guidance. I hold the intent all of you will learn to trust in your dreams coming true.

In the middle of January when it was cold and the trees were bare and the grass was barely green Aydin and I were walking home from school and he stopped, turned around and picked something up off of someone’s yard. Of course I was yelling at him to keep walking since he gets distracted so easily but then he handed me the bright yellow dandelion he just picked for me. I felt a little bad for 30 seconds until he did something else to drive me crazy. Anyway, I thought it was so odd that this dandelion was surviving the winter. Nobody else had any dandelions on their lawns so it was a mystery why this one was there. So that meant it must be a sign and when I checked the symbolism I learned it meant “wishes fulfilled”. I saved it and put it with my angel cards and every time I open my box of angel cards it reminds me that wishes will be fulfilled one day.

This one is about Keeping Hope. I have so many dreams waiting to be fulfilled that I have a hard time focusing on each one everyday. I seem to go in spurts of sometimes I focus on my books, sometimes it’s my spiritual growth or sometimes it’s just my physical self etc. For the last year I have been creating a manifestation list and every 3 months I go back and check to see what has been brought into reality. Amazingly 90% of the list happens. The one thing that has not happened yet is getting picked up by a publisher but I still have hope and I just add it to the next list each time. My list has all kinds of things on it such as what I wish for myself and what I would like for my family and friends too. I explained before how when you write things down they are supposed to have more energy to it than just a thought so making a manifestation list may help you bring your wishes into your life faster .
I started writing the above earlier in the day on Friday 4/26 and after dinner I took Aydin to Dairy Queen so I could get ice cream for my family (not me BOO) and as I was waiting in the drive thru for my order I looked across the street and saw the landscaping which was made into the word HOPE. I thought that was weird so I knew this is the right message that needs to be sent. Signs are everywhere! I’m also sent a lot of rainbows too. They symbolize God’s promise. I was even getting ready for Aydin’s Tball game this morning and as I was putting my shoes on the light from the window turned into a rainbow that was shining on both of my hands. I smiled and knew God was reminding me to keep having hope because he has blessings for me. Life really is so beautiful when you are a believer and notice the signs. I see 555- change is coming.

So I need to be honest and admit I went back to DQ the next day and got myself a treat. Actually Saturday was a bad day all around for my detox. However, I’ve decided to make every Sat my day to enjoy the things I want. I’m not trying to become a true vegan I’m just want to improve my diet so I’m listening to my body and if the food makes me feel ok then it is staying in my diet. This detox has been intense and I was starting to get leg cramps in the night and I lost about 7 lbs so I’m slowly adding foods back into my diet. But I still have hope I will succeed at limiting my sugar intake and will not use it to fill a void.

This detox also taught me a few life lessons too. I learned to not be so hard on myself for not following everything perfectly. At first I had a little guilt for cheating but then I realized this is my body and if it is telling me it does not feel well then I better listen before I create more problems. So I can look at it like I failed and bring myself down or I can look at it like I tried and I learned some really good tips that I can add to my diet to make it healthier. One of my dreams is to be in shape for the rest of my life. I like the feeling of having energy and being active so I have been trying to keep that in my life. Fortunately, I don’t have weight struggles but food is a major part of my life. I enjoy dining out with my family and friends so I was not too happy on this detox and I felt like I had to stress about what I would order at the restaurants. So now I will need to learn how to balance my diet so I can still do the things I enjoy and stay healthy too. I see 888- abundance coming. So when you think about your dreams how quickly do you lose hope? Do you set out on a mission to bring your dream into reality and then hit a bump and lose hope? Dreams don’t come easy because then we would not feel the intense drive to make them happen or the awesome feeling of success when they come true. How excited to you get when you know the exact outcome to something? Maybe a little but when you know you are definitely going to get something then we learn to expect it rather than hope for it.

This blog is very choppy because I have been writing it over 5 days and each day my thoughts have been different. Today is Wed and when I went to the park I realized what the Angels were doing over the last 5 days and now I can send the full message too. So since last Friday I have gone through a cycle of understanding how to keep hope. On Friday I was tested, on Saturday I failed, on Sun I had regrets, on Monday I was mad at myself and decided to keep failing since I already did once, on Tuesday I started over and forgave myself and on Wed I learned the lesson and I have hope. My hope was restored while I was walking to my meditation spot and I looked down and noticed all the dandelions along my path. That’s all it takes for me is a little sign of hope and then I’m able to pick myself back up and keep fighting for my dream. Once I sat down on the bench and ask the Angels for their guidance I remembered I did not check my daily inspirational message yet so I checked my email and the first thing I noticed was the advertisement for a book called Dandelions. The book is about a horse who struggled because she could not find her place in the world and then she succeeded. I love how the spirit world arranges things to happen at the perfect time. It’s always so fascinating to me. So I smiled and felt even better knowing they are telling me I’m on the right path and I will succeed with anything I set out to do. So back to you. Something tells me to put this in so I will- Macey (my puppy) just ate my pillow and now there are so many feathers all over- they are a sign the angels are near so if someone finds feathers soon then know they are around to help you out. Ok back to dreams and hope- ask yourself how would you react once you failed? Would you give up totally or would you go through the cycle of failing, forgiving and learning so you can find hope again? Again it always comes back to making the decision to view things in a positive way or a negative way. Just like me on Sun and Mon when I was focused on the negative then my mood stayed negative and my choices were not healthy ones. When I decided I want better for myself then I picked myself back up and now I’m back on track towards my goal. Setbacks are meant to happen to test you and to build you up too. I just saw a sign the other day that said “Life is about the knockdowns and living is about getting back up.” You gotta live life if you want to survive and be happy. You could be breathing but if you are not happy then you are not living. I will say it is much easier to hold onto to hope when you stop living by a calendar. Take everything one day at a time. That’s living in the moment and that is truly the best way to live life. Each day I ask my Angels to tell me “where do I need to be today?” Meaning what do I need to focus on that day. Is it myself, my family, my spirituality or really anything I feel guided to focus on. It helps me stay in the moment too. So when I asked them on Sat what I should focus on and the Angel card I picked said “reward yourself” I did just that and I will do that every Sat because I need some breaks too. So do your best to hold onto hope. If you fail then go through all of the emotions that come with failing because if you block them then you will cause yourself harm but understand failing is part of succeeding too. It’s another chance to build your strength and start again. Your dreams will happen when divine timing allows so don’t focus on a deadline just live in the moment so you can live every part of the dream not just the outcome. So as you walk through this life take time to notice the dandelions along your trail and you will remember to have hope because one day your wishes will be fulfilled. Ha ended with seeing 444- nothing to fear! Happy trails people

Before I do the Angel cards i want to add something extra- For the last two weeks at the park I have been surrounded by red winged blackbirds. They are definitely sending me a message but I had the thought to share their meaning so I will. They symbolize the ability to stay grounded while walking a spiritual path. They also can teach you to acknowledge your power and use it to it’s fullest. For me I try to keep both doors open- meaning I try to stay grounded with my earthly life and I keep the door open to the spirit world and let it guide me to where I need to go. It’s scary but when you get yourself balanced that way you will feel much better. Hope it helps. Meditation is a big help too.

Cards

Spiritual Understanding- Archangel Raziel- ” I am bringing you esoteric information and symbols, and helping you understand spiritual truths.” – I’m feeling somebody is focusing on their spirtual growth. I am and will always be growing spiritually so the best advice I can give is keep learning and healing. It gets easier but it gets crazy too so don’t fear it and you will see in time things start making sense.

Crystal Clear Intentions- St Michael- “Be clear about what you desire and focus upon it with unwavering faith.” Write your manifestation list because you will love how quickly your wishes become reality. And no fear!

Always Believe…

Once Upon A Time

I thank God for my gifts and for helping me heal during this challenging time. I ask my Angels to guide me as I write and I thank them for sending me so many signs. I hold the intent all of you take a few minutes to laugh at life.

I’ve written so many blogs about getting yourself through the challenging times in life and right now I’m in the middle of a challenge. I already know what I need to do so I can keep myself going but it helps when you can laugh at yourself as you get thrown around by life. I was getting ready for work the other day and while I was in the shower my blog “enjoy the ride” came to my mind. It’s the one I wrote about how you have to laugh when life gets crazy. I was remembering different parts of the blog and I was trying to use it so I could calm myself down a little. When I was driving to work I was thinking to myself ” at this point I just need to see this through” and just as I finished that thought I stopped at the light and looked at the car in front of me and it had a sticker with “screw it let’s ride”. I laughed and thanked the Angels for the pick me up. I see 222. I’m also sensing a big change is coming soon too. I have no idea what but I know when life feels like it’s out of control that means a major change is on it’s way. So like the Angels tell me I will “enjoy the ride”.

This one is about Transformation. Today is Wed again and I did my usual meditation in the park and then I met my healer so I could prepare for my diet detox. As she was testing different foods on me and she was telling me what I need to do I was getting overwhelmed. I see 1111- ask for what you want. My healer went into the other room for a few minutes to get some things and as I sat there by myself I was thinking “how did I get to this point”. I was also thinking “it’s fix yourself this way or it’s time for Prozac.” Just as I finished that thought a dove cooed and I knew they were telling me I need to do this for myself. So I will be starting my detox in a few days but this blog won’t be posted until later. When I think about how much my life is changing and how quickly it is happening I get a little nervous. I see 444- nothing to fear- gotta love how they send me the numbers at just the right time. I was telling my healer today that I feel like I’m being pulled in so many directions and I have to remind myself to have patience because one day it will make sense. She agreed and understood because she has felt the same way I do at one point too. She assures me that one day it will all come together for me and I will have peace. I already know deep down that there is a plan behind all of this craziness and I just need to stay strong but sometimes it does me a lot of good to take myself back to before it all started. After I left my healer I had to go buy some things from the natural food store and when I left the store I was getting into my car with my big box of stuff and I said to myself “once upon a time you were an ordinary girl living a regular life.” Then I laughed at myself and thought “damn it they got me now they are taking my cookies away and guiding me to drink green smoothies for breakfast.” Tonight is actually my first night of detoxing from sugar and it sucks lol. BTW, I’m also detoxing from facebook too so if anyone posts or messages me I may not get back to you right away because I’m only on once a week now. Yep once upon a time I was an ordinary girl living an ordinary life but look how far I’ve come by allowing the Angels to guide me and make changes. I may feel a little crazy right now but I still feel better than I did years ago. I’m doing things I never thought I would do and I’m discovering a whole new way of life I never knew existed. Seriously the night I met my healer last June I thought I was going to listen to a life coach who was going to demonstrate a raw diet and we were going to do a group meditation. Two hours later I was taste testing food I was scared of and then laid on a couch with a washcloth over my eyes and a lion takes me on a walk. Talk about WTF is going on. But I never fought it and I let the experience take me to where I meant to go next. That’s what has been the best part of this crazy ride. Not knowing where I’m going or what will happen next but whenever I look back I’m happy about where I am now. So I continue on and I get curious about who I will be 5 years from now or even 5 months from now. So ask yourself “what’s happening to you in your life right now?” What are you willing to change about yourself? Not where do you want to live or what job do you desire but what internal changes do you want to see in yourself? You ask the Angels to guide you and believe me they will be all over you with signs. Maybe it’s your health or your attitude? Anytime you are willing to make a positive change to yourself then the universe will provide you with everything or everyone you need to do so. I see 111- keep thoughts about what you desire only not what you fear. For me right now I feel this is so challenging because I’m in the process of learning how to “break the mold”. I’m healing mind, body and spirit at the same time so it’s a total transformation and when you change everything at once it’s overwhelming but I believe it will be worth it very soon. I feel I’m meant to talk about overcoming addictions to smoking, alcohol, drugs, food etc. One thing to understand is that is linked to your emotional state so if you work on your mind then you will find you have less desire for those things. I personally use food to fill voids and that’s why I wanted to eliminate sugar from my diet. I was a smoker before too but I never had a hard time stopping so I can’t give too much advice other than put it in your mind you want to stop and don’t give up trying. Your mind has so much control over how you live life and until you learn to change how your mind thinks you will most likely be living a way you really don’t want to live. When it comes to eliminating toxins or breaking bad habits it is the hardest in the beginning but if you set your mind right then you are able to keep going. However, nothing happens until you make the decision to TRY.
Today is 4/21 and I’m 9 days into my detox and cleanse. I have 14 more days to go. I have not had caffeine, refined sugar, dairy or grains in 9 days. I even had a green smoothie for breakfast today. It has not been easy but I feel really good so I’m happy I decided to do this for myself. I even went back to the natural food store the other day and when I parked the car next to me was the one with “its4me” plate and I knew they were reminding me I need to do this. Actually when I was leaving the store a different car was parked in that same spot with a plate “hope2u” So I took it as a little nudge to keep going even when it gets tough. See the Angels are always there when you need them. So my advice for this blog would be find something you want to change about yourself and do it for yourself. I see 555- change is coming. We all could change something about ourselves otherwise we would not be here anymore. Like I said maybe it’s a physical or mental change but whatever it is just keep trying and fighting through the tough times. I see 444- nothing to fear. Nothing is easy so don’t expect it to be. If you tell yourself you know it’s going to be a challenge and if you believe in yourself enough that you can overcome it then you will be able to experience the joy that comes with the end results. Really once upon a time we were all living a blissful life. Then we came into this negative world and allowed it to mold us into something we are not. So how do you transform back into who you once were? You gotta break the mold by detoxing your life little by little. As you eliminate everything that harms you(people and things) you start to feel better and will make healthy choices for yourself. I see 444 again. Follow the simple rule of if it makes you feel bad it’s got to go. So once upon a time I was a regular girl but then I decided I want better and I made some improvements and I’m still making healthier choices because I want to see where it will lead me one day. That’s my story but what will your story be?

Cards

Breathe- “take several deep breaths, and exhale slowly to awaken your energy and release old patterns.” Just Breathe. Things will calm down soon

Peace- ” Peace comes from remembering that only love is real.” It’s always nice when they send us some peace. Remember to always follow your heart no matter what and you will find peace.

Always Believe…

Times Like These

I thank God for my gifts and for picking me up when I’m down. I ask my Angels to guide me as I write and I thank them for forcing me to rest. I hold the intent all of you will learn from your hard times in life.

Today is April 1st. I’m about 3 weeks ahead with writing my blogs so this one will not be published for a few weeks. Anyway, today is a bad day for me because I’m sick, I’m depressed and annoyed because I was planning on using my day off to do lots of things for myself since the kids had school. My thoughts are not positive but I just took a shower and had some messages come to me. I had a vision of the last blog Josie’s mom wrote and the Foo Fighter’s song “times like these” came to my mind too. Marge’s blog(Josie’s Mom) was about her fears and how she has been letting them take her over. Josie has been going on with life and her heart is doing well but her Mom lives in fear. What Mom would not after almost losing your child? Anyway she reminds me that whenever I get down about my own life I should always pick myself back up by counting my blessings. She reminds me that life needs to be tough so we become stronger. Most of all she reminds me to let God show the way.

This one is about TIMES of RELEASE. Now that I have been working with my healer it is only natural for my soul to want to release my internal baggage. I have been feeling my soul pushing me to breakdown but I never like feeling depressed or having crying episodes so I was fighting it off. This explains my recent up and downs too. See I block things out and then I’m forced to surrender. I have been feeling like I’m not doing enough lately and this makes my insecurities come to the surface. There have been multiple things surrounding my life that have been pecking at my confidence issues. I talked to my healer about them and she helps me understand that my solar plexus chakra is damaged and this will create the feelings I have been experiencing. I see 444- nothing to fear. I’ve only had 2 sessions so far so I have a ways to go and I’m actually going to be working on a diet detox at the same time so I can balance my mind, body and spirit. However, as I go through this healing I will need to face the emotional ups and downs because that is how I will be able to release everything that needs to go. God always works in mysterious ways and today he (ha my ear is ringing now- so I must be getting some divine info)anyway today he wanted me to rest and take the time to deal with the things I have been shoving to the side. If I was not sick then I would have been running around doing things that would distract me from the issues I have been stuffing down. It’s one of his “tough love” days so I will pick myself back up. So today I spent some time reading, crying and discovering another part of myself. First I did some reading about spiritual stuff then I read Marge’s blog again and this lead me to crying. Her blogs always make me cry, she heals me with her words and she has never met me or does not know I read her blogs but she writes about her life and I always connect with her feelings. Hopefully I do that for some of you. In this blog she wrote about her fears and she mentions how statistics show Josie’s heart may only last 15 yrs(she had her transplant at 8). She wrote about how she has been to 6 viewings of children who did not survive and she wrote about how the only way she survives every day is by having trust in God’s plan. Having trust in God’s plan is something I try very hard to do each day. However, when I start to feel like I’m not doing enough with my service what I’m really doing is trying to create the outcome I want to see rather than waiting for God’s plan(which is always better than I could imagine). When I read about the 6 children it made me cry because it’s just not right. I understand God has a plan for all of us but we humans also have a responsibility to help each other too. I see 11/33 this is a message that needs to be sent out. I have been trying for a few years now to raise awareness for organ donation but I’ve learned not too many really care about it. How do you not take 5 minutes to register to save a life once you leave this world or make a small donation to help the cause? I go over it and over it in my head and I really try to not judge people but honestly I get frustrated. I feel my purpose with the cause is to bring people the opportunity to do some good. I can’t force anyone but I can bring it to their attention. I don’t support the cause for myself I do it because I think it’s time people realize how serious it is when someone needs a transplant. Those 6 kids are just the ones Josie knew during her 1 year of waiting for a heart. There are so many others that die each day and we never hear anything about them. So it’s times like these that make me realize I can’t save the world on my own but I can be proud of what I have done to create positive change. God wants me to send the message out but he does not expect me to take on the responsibilities of others. I see 999- get to work on your purpose.
I took a break for a couple of days so now it’s Wed 4/3. Today is my mental health day and I just got back from the park. I’m still not feeling totally peaceful but I’m getting better. When I first started walking today I was greeted by a dove who kept chirping away at me so I know it was trying to help me feel better. He even showed up while I was sitting in my meditation spot and starting cooing for a few minutes. I smile when I hear that sound now so it made me feel better. When I got home I felt the urge to do some writing and sometimes before I write I listen to the songs I talk about in the blog. It gives me a chance to hear what the message is that they want me to send. So I listened to Times Like These and as I was listening to it a little nat kept flying around me. They symbolize purification. See even the smallest bugs bring a message. Nats show up out of no where sometimes but I’m starting to notice it’s always when I’m not feeling my best. No coincidences. Anyway, as I was watching this nat and listening to the song I was getting the message about why they sent me the song the other day. This is for all of us. The times when we feel down, confused and hopeless are meant to make us notice theses are the times we need to purify ourselves by learning to love, give and live. If we fall into the wanting to give up feeling, turning towards fear rather than love or choose to accept where we are rather than trying to live they way we desire we become infected with negativity and unhappiness. So for me since I was feeling like I’m not doing enough for the cause I then started to point the finger towards others as though they are not doing their part either. Because I was annoyed at myself I was annoyed at others. See now it all makes sense to me what was going on. I’m going through healing so I’m stirring up my issues that are deep within and since I was trying to push them away rather than deal with them and let them go I let them stay inside and create more issues which led to anger and depression. Once I do that then I start to change into someone I am not rather than acting in my normal way which is by what my heart tells me to do. Now that I’m purifying myself from the negativity I can view my frustrations in a more positive way. I can understand it’s not about people not taking the time to donate or register it’s about me not giving up and me learning to give myself credit for my efforts. It’s about me learning to love who I am because I choose to help even when others don’t and that just means I can see it more than they can so I’m meant to help them see without judging them. Which will result in learning to love people unconditionally and that’s what we are all here to do. I see 333- they agree. Like my healer says “we are all here to learn how to share this space.” We need to learn to accept each other even though we are different in some ways but the same inside. So ask yourself what has been digging at your soul and causing you to feel down? Who are you pointing the finger at and judging? How can you turn it around on yourself so you can see the real problem? What’s the lesson you need to learn from it too? What needs to be released so you can stop causing more internal damage? It’s times like these that give you a chance to look deeper and understand yourself more. It’s times like these that you learn to love yourself more by allowing the healing to take place. It’s times like these you strengthen yourself so you have the desire to keep giving the world what you are meant to give. It’s times like these that life starts to make sense because without learning, giving and loving there is no life to live.

Cards

All Is Well- “everything is happening exactly as it’s supposed to, with hidden blessings you will soon understand.” The best thing to do during tough times is to understand they are always necessary for growth. You won’t see the blessings until you look back and understand why you had to face tough times. Just keep moving forward knowing it’s all meant to be.

Indigo and Crystal Children- “You have a bond with children. In particular,you can help children who are sensitive.” My first thought was some need to learn about indigo and crystal children because you may be one or be a parent to one. It’s very important to understand them because we are so sensitive to everything and the food we eat and the people and places we are near can affect us in a negative way so you need to learn how to keep yourself protected and feeling good by avoiding certain foods. If you are one you will know for sure once you read the description. It all makes sense and that’s how you know you are an indigo. I see 333- they agree. The crystal children are the younger generation but some kids can behave more like an indigo too.

Always Believe…

To Live Again

I thank God for my gifts and for blessing me with the experiences of healing my soul. I ask my angels to guide me as I write and I thank them for their support. I hold the intent all of you will make an effort to understand your soul.

I had another session with my healer and this time I was able to see the life right before this one. I was a boy and I drowned by falling off of a boat while fishing with my Dad. I was not raised by a mom because she died young from illness and I lived with my Dad and Grandparents. My father was sent to jail because of my accident and it was not his fault. When I saw myself fall into the ocean my father did not react and he sat there in shock. He did not show any emotion until he told my Grandmother what happened and then I saw him taken away by the cops and put in jail. During my journey it showed that my soul stayed with my Dad and I did not move on into the light. When spirits do this they will latch on to those who are physically living and use their energy to stay in this dimension. Since this is what I did I then absorbed my father’s ways of handling his emotions and his way of communicating. You really need to have the session for yourself to get the whole picture but I’m truly amazed by how much healing I’m getting just from 2 sessions so far. Anyway, my healer was able to point out to me that coming into this life I was bringing in a past trauma from my last life with my father. So that means I connect with my Dad’s way of expressing himself and that is how I learned to express myself. I already figured this out on my own but this ties in with a lot of my childhood issues and adult relationships too. In my life now my Dad was in the military and my healer pointed out which I feel we all need to understand is that when men go into the military they are trained to never show weakness. They are trained to form male bonding and they never really get over that way of life once they are done with the military. So that means when my parents got together the relationship was never ideal. My Mom has issues from her childhood so her part in their relationship was the complete opposite to my Dad’s. For me my only memories of my parents being together are arguments. My healer pointed out I have memory from age 5 but I have been around that energy from the beginning of my life. I’ve witnessed my Mother demanding and my father not responding and from that I learned to take on my dad’s way of communication and lack of showing affection. My journey showed me how I let my feminine energy die by choosing to push away and close myself off to others.

So this one is about Balancing your Feminine and Masculine energies. We all have a soul which is made up of energy. Everything is energy and that’s why we can absorb it from anyone and everything anywhere. You can’t see it but you will always feel it when this happens. Our souls also live thousands of lives and collect info so we can evolve. However, we also keep trauma in our souls too and then each life we relive a similar experience until we are able to release it and heal. Here is where I’m at with healing- I’ve done all I could do on my own, I’ve pretty much discovered most of my issues I have in this life and my soul retrieval confirmed everything I have figured out so far. However, I don’t know where the issues originated other than what I can recall in this life. So I have decided to go deeper and learn about past lives. It was not enough for me to only heal what I experienced in this life because even though I have more peace I still have struggles which tells me I needed to seek help from a spiritual healer. I do feel it’s best to learn about yourself before you seek a healer because then you will be able to understand what the healer points out to you without getting defensive. We are all at different levels with our healing so if you are just beginning than maybe you are not ready for a healer but if you are like me and have gone deep but still can’t release your issues than it may be time to seek a professional healer. So our souls are made up of energy and we each have male and female energy. The trouble starts when they are not balanced. The male side is on the left side of the brain and works the right side of the body. The female is on the right side of brain and works the left side of body. If you have any blocks than if something manifests on your right side of the body it is linked to the male energy being out of balance. The opposite for blocks with the female energy. The male energy deals with rationality, understanding, aggression, logic and linear thinking. The female energy deals with emotions, caring, nurturing, compassion, intuition and love etc. When my healer told me I let my feminine energy die I knew exactly what that meant. I took on a role of survival and became very independent in life. She pointed out that my journey showed how I have felt alone in life and this caused me to learn to survive on my own. This is why I still struggle with receiving. I also lived a lot of my life by shutting people out if they hurt me. I try not to do this anymore but I’m very good at closing people off and not even caring-it’s a feeling of once I’m done I’m done. I used to feel it’s easier to stay mad at someone than to look at both sides. I’ve worked through this a lot but it’s still hard for me to trust people once they have hurt me. Is that wrong? I don’t think so because sometimes people need to earn your trust back. They need to learn to appreciate you and treat you the way you deserve. I read something once that said “you can’t have a deep relationship with a shallow person” so true so know what your worth is and leave the ones who have done wrong to you learn that on their own. This is different from not trusting anyone. If someone has never done anything wrong to you and you assume they are out to get you then understand that is coming from your own insecurities. However, if someone has hurt you and continues to do hurtful things to you than I feel it’s a lesson of learning to respect yourself more and let them go. Shallow people lie, cheat, manipulate and lack something inside of themselves and you will never be able to have a meaningful relationship with someone who is like that. I see 222- keep the faith. People make mistakes but it has to be up to them to see their own mistakes and right their wrongs. Another part of keeping yourself in balance is balancing your giving and receiving. You will need to learn how to give and receive. I personally struggle with receiving. I will give all I have to someone else but I have a hard time accepting it in return. My healer pointed out to me that people will feel my inability to receive and it will make them feel it in a negative way. I see 222 again. I’m thinking it may feel the same way as when you give something to someone and they reject it because of their own issues and not because of you but you still wonder if it is because of you. So if you are a giver than take notice that you are receiving just the same. And if you tend to receive more than give than you may want to work on doing more and taking less. Trying to understand everything about your soul can be very complex so that’s why I always simplify it by going to my heart for answers. Just ask yourself if you are truly at peace in every area of your life and if the answer is yes than you are balanced. Keep in mind when I say “at peace” it does not mean there are no major issues surrounding your life. I’m saying even though you are facing tough times you still have a mind-set of everything will workout someday. None of us are free from life’s issues but we can find peace for free by going within and believing everything works out the best way possible. I don’t feel I have mastered balancing my male/female energies but I have made a lot of improvements. I have gone from being “the chick with a dude’s attitude” to a woman who shows her heart,learned how to be understanding and has become strong but able to admit my weaknesses too. It took so much work and every time I think I’m almost done more shows up to be healed. Our souls are filled with so much crap and that’s why it has to be removed one layer at a time. Otherwise we would be bombarded with too much at once. I’m in one of my emotional rollercoaster phases again because I have been feeling it off and on for 2 weeks now. I can’t stand theses phases but I know when they stop for a little bit I always feel so good and gain so much clarity too. It could be because I’m doing some deep healing with my sessions too. There is a part in the journey when you are given healing energy into the chakra that holds the trauma. You can actually feel the energy come into your body. However, whenever you have energy work done it will take sometime to get adjusted again. So learn how to balance yourself by showing love but staying strong, release your emotions and be understanding, give of yourself but receive just the same, learn to be a survivor but don’t be a loner etc. It’s a constant dance with your energies of who will take the lead so you really need to learn how to keep both sides at the same level. I will say I have brought my female side back to life by viewing everything through love. Once I trained myself to do this I calmed my male side at the same time. Some people have been very lucky I have changed my ways so much because they have been spared many a bitch out lol However, I’m still working on my occasional road rage lol. So underneath all the fear, pain and trauma there is a balanced soul that wants to be shown. There is a piece of you that wants to love without fear, live with inner peace and play your true part in this world. I will never tell you it is easy to find but I will tell you it’s not impossible. I’ve decided to look at my personal healing as a goal. I remind myself that things take time and a goal requires a little bit of work each day even when we can’t see the end result. This helps me when I have my tough days of sadness and confusion. I remember to focus on the outcome instead of focusing on the pain. I can’t get to the outcome without the pain so I’m still working towards my goal but I remind myself it’s ok if I’m not strong everyday. The weakness that comes to surface in me happens for a reason so I will know to balance my energies. Once I calm the ego then I allow my heart to guide me. So to simplify how the energies work- think about what happens when you act agressively- usually results in fighting or negative behavior, when you act too passively- usually results in getting taken advantage of or disrespected. So the goal is to mesh both energies and become a person who can stand up for yourself without insulting or physically hurting someone, be someone who can open your heart and feel compassion for others but still knowing what you do and don’t deserve and be someone who can be happy with or without anything in life (material and people). It’s always about balance. Life will always get stirred up in one or more areas but when you learn how to keep yourself balanced then you find inner peace. You will know when you find it and you will know when you need to work to keep it too. So ask yourself which side of you is dying? Are you so weak that your male side needs some saving or is your ego so in control that your female side is lost? So do the work it takes, understand it won’t be easy, know it’s not impossible and learn to live again. Ended with another 222- that number has been jumping out a lot with these blogs so it may be a signal to someone to pay attention. Just my gut feeling so I figured I would share.

Today is April 6 and I started this blog about 2 weeks ago- I see 222 again (this is crazy so I def know this is a signal for someone) anyway for 2 weeks now I have had 2 crows(they symbolize change) stalking me by sitting in the same tree all day and whenever I get out of my car they are there and squawking at me. I also have been getting strong vibes about planes being a message too(they can mean higher awareness, seeing the bigger picture and wishes fulfilled) . I feel I’m meant to share this so I will- the message is change is a definite and it may be a little bumpy at times but if you keep your awareness high then you will be able to look at things beyond what is going on right now and you will see your wishes will be fulfilled by divine timing. Hope it helps.

Cards

Victory- “Your prayers have been heard and answered. Have faith.”- See wishes fulfilled!! Trust in Divine Timing and it will all workout very soon.

Breathe- “Take several deep breaths, and exhale slowly to awaken your energy and release old patterns.” Training yourself to breathe when you feel overwhelmed is a huge stress reliever so I suggest you try it out. No worries tough times don’t stay forever.

Always Believe…